You can listen to this article by clicking the play button on the Audioplayer below:I was once asked an intriguing question by one of my clients.
"Won't saying positive things to myself make me delusional, especially when I don't believe them to be true?"
Now, isn't that interesting? You see, many of us say negative things to ourselves and about ourselves on a continuous basis, e.g. "Stupid!" "Clumsy!" "Fool!"
And, we say these things so often that we begin to accept them as FACT.
In reality, they are lies that we say to ourselves but even if you repeat a lie often enough you will soon start to believe it. This is particularly true when a lot of emotion is put into it as is generally the case when we say negative things to ourselves.
The negative self-talk is usually accompanied by feelings of anger, frustration, humiliation, resentment, etc. and often leads to depression. These emotions allow the self-talk to penetrate the sub-conscious mind.
Repeating these sentiments over and over again is like seasoning meat. Imagine rubbing seasoning into a piece of meat and perhaps even making small incisions so that the seasoning can penetrate deep into its flesh, imparting its flavor. However, the herbs and spices that you have selected are pungent and bitter so that when you taste the cooked meat it is not palatable.
Now here's the curious thing. Even although you don't like the end result you keep using the same recipe. The finished product still tastes just as bad but you begin to convince yourself that it's ok. Heck! You could get used to this…perhaps even grow to like it. You say to yourself that this is just the way things are and you don't do anything about it. It's too much effort to change.
Yes, you start to rationalize.
But you can change and while it may take some effort the results are so worth it - once you find your winning combination. You could share your new recipe with others. You could even sell your new recipe!
So how do you effect change? Simply put:
1. Stop the negative self-talk, and
2. Use positive affirmations on a daily basis.
Using positive affirmations regularly will commence the gradual process of the re-conditioning your sub-conscious mind. It's like trying to restore a ruined and neglected house that was once a beautiful, well-kept home with flourishing gardens. The restoration work will take time, patience, attention to detail and a methodical, persistent approach. Yet, once achieved it will not only bring enormous joy to its owner, it will have a positive effect on all those who glimpse this beautiful dwelling.
It won't be easy. Your old self image will put up a fight. It doesn't like change. Change feels uncomfortable.
Also, we are trained to assess situations using just our basic senses. Hence, when your bank statements shows a low, or perhaps even a negative, balance; when it seems that there are more bills than money to pay them; it is all too easy to think lack and poverty. Yet money is in abundance.
Similarly, when your blood tests and x-rays indicate a diseased body, it is difficult to focus on health. However, there are many documented cases where individuals have disregarded negative diagnosis and restored health to their bodies and sometimes even saved their own lives using the power of positive thought and affirmations.
Saying positive affirmations such as: "I am rich…I have a healthy body…I am very successful" may seem crazy to someone who doesn't understand mind dynamics. But even if your present circumstances do not support your positive affirmations, repeating positive affirmations forms an important role in conditioning your sub-conscious to produce the results you desire in your life.
Claude Bristol, author of "The Magic of Believing" said,
"It's the repetition of affirmations that leads to belief. And once that belief becomes a deep conviction, things begin to happen."
So, it's no use just saying positive affirmations in an absent-minded fashion. You have to get emotionally involved with your new affirmations for them to become a "deep conviction", to effectively take root in your sub-conscious mind and successfully replace your hidden image that is creating the results you don't want.
I like to start my affirmations by saying - "I'm so happy and grateful now that I am…" - a technique that was taught to me by Bob Proctor. The beauty of this is that it's a positive affirmation all on its own!
Also, gratitude opens up channels so that you receive more of the things you want and appreciate.
So persist with your positive affirmations until they become deep-rooted in your sub-conscious mind. Your reward will be an enhanced self-image and a more abundant life.
positive affirmations negative self talk gratitude
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